AUTHOR LINDSAY DETWILER
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Contemporary Romance Author

It's Okay to Be a Tired Woman

3/30/2017

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Mental Exhaustion

It's Okay to Be a Tired Woman

When the alarm's annoying buzz blares at 5:45 am, there is one thought that immediately comes to mind: I can't wait until I can go back to bed.

Lately, the pep in my step, the energy to meet the day, has been lost. At 29, I have a lot to be excited about and a lot to be grateful to jump out of bed for. I have my dream career, a writing career on the side, a wonderful husband, a loyal family, all the cats a girl could want, and many more great things. I have plenty of reasons to be energized and enthusiastic about life.

But lately, it's been a struggle to overcome one huge hurdle: I'm tired.

It's not just a lack of sleep or a restless night kind of tired, though. It's a bone-chilling, wearying tired. It's a can't even function, can't even find a smile kind of tired. It's a body tired, brain tired, heart tired kind of tired.

I'm just tired.

I crave weekend sleep-ins. I dream about the next time I don't have to set an alarm. I hurry home, not so I can do things I really want to do, but so I can melt into the couch in my pajamas at four o'clock and watch Netflix.

I'm just plain tired. I'm exhausted. I'm rundown, worn out, beat down, done.

And yet, behind the tired, one feeling simultaneously rules my mind: guilt.

The Do-It-All Woman of 2017

Looking at my own life and at my female friends' lives, it's no wonder so many of us have become practical zombies, both physically and mentally.

Because we are told we can do it all as a woman, we feel like it's our obligation. We try to excel at our jobs and put in 110% effort in every task. We challenge ourselves to keep our homes at unreasonable levels of cleanliness and organization. We take care of husbands, kids, parents, and pets. We run from event to event so as not to be anti-social. We join groups, volunteer, contribute, and organize at every chance we get. We make sure we say "yes" more than we say "no" so that we are a team-player.

A woman in 2017, after all, has to be a go-getter, a doer, and accomplisher...in all aspects of life. To step back, to take it easy is to fail. At least this is what society seems to tell us.

Pulled in ninety-eight different directions, it's no wonder we're all feeling run-down. It's no wonder there are mornings when we truly consider smashing the alarm clock into pieces or running away. It's no wonder our biggest goal sometimes is to climb into bed, uninterrupted, and just sleep away the day.

Many of us have backed ourselves into a corner and left no room for breathing. We fill our days with so much stuff, that we can't possibly have a minute to just relax. Our days are crazy packed races and to-do lists. A moment not accomplishing is a moment wasted. 

In short, we are tired because we don't let ourselves have a moment to get rested. We put so many other people, events, duties, and tasks above ourselves, that we are bound to run out of fuel.

We are left decrepit and downtrodden. But even then, we don't cut ourselves slack. We are left feeling like there's something wrong with us or like we are failures.

We tell ourselves we need to just move on and find energy. We need to eat more oranges or drink more coffee. There are, after all, no excuses for the 2017 woman to just take a break.

Learning to Listen to Your Body

It's easy to fall into the do-it-all trap. It's easy to ignore the extra yawns, the negative feelings, and the desire to just take a step back.

However, to be a strong woman in 2017 and to be a woman who can find true meaning in life, we must be willing to listen to our bodies. We must hear ourselves when we say we're tired. We must recognize that we can't run on E forever, and that it's okay to say "no." 

We must be willing to realize the weariness in our bones is a warning flag that we need to take care of ourselves. We must realize that taking care of ourselves isn't selfish or wrong.

We must learn that although we can do it all, we don't have to. Mental and physical wellness are both crucial elements of happiness. To ignore our exhaustion, physically and mentally, is to not be our best selves in any aspect of life.

So to all you tired women out there, take a break. Take a moment. Take a day. Take a weekend. Take time for you, just you, to sit back and relax. Take time to say "no" even if you feel like you should say yes. Take time to skip a practice, a meeting, or an event. Take time to rejuvenate and to relax.

Take time to realize it's okay to be tired...but it's not okay to ignore it.
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Petit Vour March Unboxing: Cruelty-Free Beauty

3/24/2017

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Petit Vour March Beatuy Box
The cruelty-free March Beauty Box by Petit Vour, $15

Cruelty-Free Beauty: Petty Vour March Box

Why I Love Petit Vour

A few years ago, I saw a video that changed everything in my beauty junkie ways.

A Beagle Freedom Project video popped up on my Facebook, and I never looked at makeup the same way. After seeing the torture these animals go through during animal testing, I vowed never to let an animal suffer just so I could have pretty blush or nice, blending eyeshadow. 

When I first made the choice to go cruelty-free with cosmetics, things weren't easy. High quality products were few and far between. It was truly a sacrifice. Even things like the makeup box subscriptions were off the table since they included many products that tested on animals or included ingredients tested on animals.

Then I came across Petit Vour. This cruelty free company mails a monthly subscription box with four items each month. Every item is 100% cruelty free and also vegan. These all natural products range from makeup to skincare to hair care. Even the sample sizes are decently sized, but sometimes you even get full-size products. 

I've been a member of this program for over a year now. For $15 a month (which includes shipping), it's great to try new products and get a fun surprise in the mail each month. 

What's in the March Box

This month, the box includes:
  • Kani Botanicals Galaxy Milk Illuminating Beauty Oil ($16)
  • Metta Intensive Replenishing Face Balm ($12.50)
  • Little Barn Apothecary Blue Yarrow and Geranium Cleansing Oil ($8)
  • Formulary55 Rosehip and clay facial mask ($8)

My review of the box

This month was mostly skin care products, which is what I really like to try from Petit Vour. I have used items from Little Barn Apothecary and am excited for the cleansing oil. I like that it says it tones and hydrates in addition to cleansing. I'm also a huge fan of masks, so I'm excited to pop that on (impromptu spa day, anyone?).

The face balm definitely looks like something to wear at night only and even suggests that on the directions. It looks a little heavy, so I do worry about clogging pores. It is formulated with rare East African shea butter, though, which sounds like it would be super hydrating. My skin is coming off of the harsh winter months, so it probably could use something like this right now.

The only negative thing I have to say is that I'm worried about the illuminating beauty oil. I tried a bit on today and feel like it makes my nose look greasy instead of dewy. I'm also super not confident in my contouring/highlighting abilities, so I'm not sure if I trust myself with this. It has high amounts of glitter that do fade into your skin once the oil is absorbed, but I just have this inward fear of looking like a disco diva and no one telling me.

So I'll come back and give more feedback once I've tried the items, but so far it looks like a nice box as far as skin goes. Check back next month to see what April's box is or head to Petit Vour for your box now!
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Tale As Old As Time...Review

3/19/2017

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Beauty and the Beast Review

Beauty and the Beast 2017 Review

As a child, Beauty and the Beast was my favorite movie. I loved Beauty's gorgeous, princess-like dresses. I loved the talking candlestick and Chip. I loved the magic of the "Be Our Guest" Scene. I loved the final scene, when a kiss turned the Beast into a Prince. 

Perhaps Beauty and the Beast set me up to be both a hopeless romantic and a romance writer.

When I found out the movie was being redone as a live-action movie and Emma Watson would be playing Beauty, I squealed like the five-year-old I still act like. I've been counting down the days until release since I first saw the trailer. Quite simply, I was entranced before even entering the theater.

The movie did not disappoint. Emma Watson played her part beautifully. From her acting to her voice, she did Belle justice. The dresses were just as gorgeous as I could hope. Plus, she captured the defiant yet caring sides of Belle and really enhanced the role. 

The Beast was more frightening in appearance than the one from my childhood, but it also worked well. The personalities of all of the other characters were maintained. I love that they came to life, although I do think Lumiere was cuter as a cartoon than in this movie.

My favorite scene was the "Be Our Guest" song, which literally gave me chills. It was my favorite as a child, so to see it in 3-D was magical. To think about what my five-year-old self would have thought of this scene literally coming to life is a beautiful thought. It was stunning and fun, just like I'd always imagined it to be.

The "Tale as Old as Time" scene was also breathtaking. The dance scene was gorgeous, and I couldn't take my eyes away.

My only complaint is I wish the movie could have been longer. I would have loved to see extra scenes between Beauty and the Beast to build their love story. However, this movie did a great job at sticking to the original while adding some extra information about both characters' backgrounds. I adored this movie and cannot wait to buy it. If you liked the original, you should definitely see this one.

5 out of 5 stars.
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March 19th, 2017

3/19/2017

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New Romantic Drama: Remember When


Author: Lindsay Detwiler

Title: Remember When

Genre: Contemporary Romance

Release Date: April 29, 2017

Publisher: Hot Tree Publishing

Cover Designer: Claire Smith


 Add to TBR


 PREORDER NOW FOR HALF PRICE 

Amazon: http://amzn.to/2nBtxBk

All other links: http://books2read.com/remember-when



This wasn’t how it was supposed to be….


They met at a wedding, Todd the only man wearing jeans, Jessica the beauty with a troubled background. Settled into married life after falling in love, they have so many things left to do in life. They think they have so much time… until Jessica and Todd’s average married life comes to a halt on a snowy back road. When their truck careens down an embankment, they find themselves in a life-or-death situation. With rescue seeming impossible, they cling to the only hope they have left: their love for each other.


As they fight for survival, their connection carries them through the biggest challenge of their lives. Memories and regrets swirl around the couple as they finally take a moment to reflect on what they’re doing in life.


There’s one big, icy question that haunts them, though: Is this where their story will end?



 PREORDER NOW FOR HALF PRICE 

Amazon: http://amzn.to/2nBtxBk

All other links: http://books2read.com/remember-when



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A high school English teacher, an author, and a fan of anything pink and/or glittery, Lindsay's the English teacher cliché; she love cats, reading, Shakespeare, and Poe.


She currently lives in her hometown with her husband, Chad (her junior high sweetheart); their cats, Arya, Amelia, Alice, and Bob; and their Mastiff, Henry.


Lindsay's goal with her writing is to show the power of love and the beauty of life while also instilling a true sense of realism in her work. Some reviewers have noted that her books are not the “typical romance.” With her novels coming from a place of honesty, Lindsay examines the difficult questions, looks at the tough emotions, and paints the pictures that are sometimes difficult to look at. She wants her fiction to resonate with readers as realistic, poetic, and powerful. Lindsay wants women readers to be able to say, “I see myself in that novel.” She wants to speak to the modern woman’s experience while also bringing a twist of something new and exciting. Her aim is for readers to say, “That could happen,” or “I feel like the characters are real.” That’s how she knows she's done her job.


Lindsay's hope is that by becoming a published author, she can inspire some of her students and other aspiring writers to pursue their own passions. She wants them to see that any dream can be attained and publishing a novel isn’t out of the realm of possibility.

 Rescue Me Submissions

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The Strength to Find Your True Smile

3/16/2017

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The Strength to Find Your True Smile

Women Don't Smile
What does it mean to be a strong woman?
​She paints it on, her ruby red lips stretching as though they’re going to crack. Inside, a formidable storm circles and bubbles, but she has to suppress it. She can’t let it surface. She can’t let it ruin the perfect smile, the eloquently highlighted grin that reassures the world she’s fine, she’s great, she’s happy.

Because to show anything but the smile would be disastrous, especially in a world that shuns unhappiness. She must wear the face, play the part, and be thankful and gracious. She must smile.

Day after day, the red-lip façade carries on. Day after day, the storm brews a little more, threatening to usurp her. It simmers with feelings of anxiety, loss, and a lack of self-identity. It swarms her, making her feel heavy and exhausted. It’s hard working up the courage to wear a smile in the middle of an earth-shattering eruption. It’s hard to cover those feelings.

But smile she does because smile she must. She’s learned from childhood what it means to be a “good woman.” It means being thankful even when you’re frustrated or disappointed. It means being gracious and kind, sugary sweet words always dripping from your lips even in the face of injustice. It means carrying on when you’re weary in your bones and in your heart. It means doing more and complaining less. It means putting others first.

Most of all, it means you smile, even when you don’t feel like it.
​
So she smiles. I smile. We all smile.

Strong Women Don't Always Smile


​But what good is this smile? What purpose is it serving? Certainly being appreciative and being kind are noble pursuits. However, does this mean that a fake smile trumps genuine feeling? Does it mean we must suppress our true desires, fears, anguish, and confusion just so the world can see the mask we wear? Is a smile really what we value in ourselves and in other women?

Instead of teaching our girls to grow up to be kind, smiling women, maybe our focus should shift. We should focus on teaching our girls to be appreciative and kind. We should teach our girls to be gracious and thankful. But we should also teach our girls that sometimes, life is hard. Sometimes, you don’t feel thankful or fulfilled. You don’t feel happy or appreciative. Sometimes you will feel walked on, underappreciated, lost, and confused.

In these moments, painting a fake smile on is not a necessity or requirement. In moments of struggle, it’s okay to show it. It’s okay to not be the smiling, strong woman who can take on the world every second of life. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to frown. It’s okay to stand up for yourself.

Smiling is a beautiful thing when it comes from a place of truth. But to be a strong woman is not to smile at everything in life. To be a strong woman is to be genuine. It’s to feel what you feel when you feel it. It’s to look past social expectations to find the real you, the true you, and to let yourself feel every part of what that looks like, smile or not.

So for you, I hope for many days of genuine smiles. However, I also hope that on days you don’t feel like smiling…you don’t. I hope you have the confidence to own your emotions. I hope you have good friends and family to lean on, who don’t expect the ruby red grin when you don’t  mean it. I hope you have a support system strong enough to hold you up when you just can’t bear to smile anymore.

I hope you find your people, the people who can bring back a real smile to your face even when you don’t think it’s possible.
​
Above all, I hope you find the courage to go after what makes you genuinely smile and never force yourself to fall in love with a life that requires the art of fake smiling.
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Best Romance Reads: Becoming Calder by Mia Sheridan

3/13/2017

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Becoming CalderBecoming Calder by Mia Sheridan
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

"And just like that, the whole world was a place I no longer recognized."

Becoming Calder is the story of love, sacrifice, and the realization that life isn't always what you think it is.

Calder and Eden live in Acadia, a religious sect separated from the world. Eden is promised to Hector, the leader of Acadia. She is to wed him when she comes of age so the group will be able to get to Elysium, their version of heaven. However, as the story unfolds and Calder and Eden grow up, it becomes apparent that Acadia has many cult-like tendencies. Nothing is quite as it seems, and Hector is a volatile, angry leader. When Eden and Calder begin to explore a friendship that turns into something more, they must choose between the life they've known and the big world outside of Acadia. However, Hector isn't going to let Eden go without a price.

I was entranced by this book from page one. Sheridan paints a clear image of Acadia as a utopian environment--and then she tears that image right down. To see Eden and Calder's acceptance of their way of life turn into questioning stirs themes of identity and happiness. Both believe in the values of Acadia without question until certain events make them wonder if they are living a lie. This realization drives the plot of the book forward and hooks the reader.

Calder and Eden are both developed fully throughout the novel. I loved watching them grow and learn about life, about the world, and about who they really are. Most of all, I enjoyed watching their relationship grow and develop. Their love is pure and rich but also passionate. In a hopeless situation, their love drives them forward, really showing that love can save us. I was rooting for their love story the entire book, even up through the exciting ending.

Sheridan does an amazing job at weaving tension into the story. I was constantly on the edge of my seat, my stomach twisting with fear for the two protagonists. I loved that we got to see the story from both Eden and Calder's perspective because it only heightened my appreciation for their relationship and for what they both had to lose.

This book is beautiful in the simplicity of the world Eden and Calder fall in love, but also in the complexity of it. As the story unfolds, you realize that Eden and Calder's love is their saving grace and is even more of a treasure considering the circumstances in which it blossoms. This book is a refreshing reminder of what freedom and love truly look like. I will definitely be reading more books by Sheridan, including the sequel, Finding Eden.

View all my reviews
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3 Harsh But Eye-Opening Writing Tips From Great Authors By Joe Baldwin

3/13/2017

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Writing Tips
There are loads of people who think they can write novels, sing, dance, or even paint, but the thing is having the creative desire to do so doesn’t make you an artist. I had a friend who dreamed of becoming a writer, but he couldn’t even make it to the half page of a school essay. He realized thereafter that writing wasn’t really for him. Just like him, there are many people who are ready to take out their pen and paper, that doesn’t mean they’re going to write something anytime now.

It’s also the same with other types of art. When someone tries to sing, write or take on the dance floor, they might be able to get some of the lyrics and tunes. They might be able to get some of the dance steps right, but that doesn’t mean that they could do it in a creative way like dancers do.

They might be able to write a few paragraphs but doesn’t mean that it’s going to make sense. Writing, just like most creative areas, is half art and half science. People might be able to hire an expert to teach them a few tricks, but that wouldn’t do much to help them become the writer or artist they truly aspire to be. It might give them a few points, but there is only one way to become a writer, and that’s by going through loads of failure.
Writing isn’t just a matter of words. It’s more about the art of using them in such a way that it stirs human interest. And to do that, one needs experience. Even one of the world’s greatest writers such as Vladimir Nabokov went through a harsh rejection when he first submitted “Lolita” to Knopf.  But guess what? Later on, his piece sold about fifty million copies.

So, even if you think you’re a really fantastic writer, you’re still bound to receive criticisms from people, perhaps even some mockery. Not to worry, though. It’s all just part of the whole process.  Anyhow, let’s dig on some of the writing advice from great writers. After all, we’re all going to tear into the publishing industry anytime now, so let’s might as well be prepared.

“The first draft of anything is shit.” -  Ernest Hemingway

Some people imagine writing a novel and turning it into a publishing firm the next day. Well, the process is actually more complicated than that. The first draft is only the preface of the whole writing process.  There are 5 kinds of drafts in the writing process: (1) the junk draft (2) the structure draft (3) the rough draft (4) the surgery draft (5) and the last draft. The junk draft is as you guessed is the first draft. It’s not surprising to find loads of typos and errors here. After all, not even great writers can perfect their craft during the first try. The structure draft is the part where you’ve managed to read your junk draft for the first time and realized that there was something wrong with the order. It didn’t quite make sense, and so you decided to restructure the idea flow. The rough draft is when you already have something that’s a work in progress. This when your piece is already in good shape, but you still need to work on some of the parts. The surgery draft is when you already removed some bits and excess from your piece that might sway the reader from the real essence of the story. And finally, the last draft! Your story isn’t for you. It’s for the people who will be reading it. This is when you already asked some people to read your manuscript and ask for feedback. Your story isn’t for you. It’s for the people who will be reading it.

So, you see? There’s no harm in reviewing the first draft before making it your final piece. If you’re just going to write a book any anyway, make it the best.

“You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” – Jack London
I know loads of writing enthusiasts who are dying to write their first book. They never did. Why? They keep on waiting for that grand inspiration that’s going to tell them the plot to their story. Look, it’s true that sometimes inspiration just hits you like a ton of bricks, but these instances are so rare that you’d be waiting your whole life, and you still won’t have your book yet. Writing prompts and inspirations aren’t magic, and riders aren’t magicians either. Writing is a skill. You have to go and work for it.

If you really want to write a book and then you’ve got to work for it too. That being said, you can’t just wait for some random inspiration to hit you right in the face and tell you what to write about. You have to go and decide for yourself what to write about, and then from there, you can start seeking ways on how to write it.

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. ― W. Somerset Maugham

People who want to be good at writing thinks that they can be better by asking experts to teach them their tricks, but it’s just like what I’ve said in the beginning of this article: writing is half art and half science. It’s true that you won’t make it far as a writer if you don’t know how to use proper grammar, or if you don’t the exact words to use, but the thing is you won’t make it far either if you only arm yourself with writing technicalities. Most of the aspects that make up writing have something to do with creativity. That’s something you need if you want to succeed in the writing industry in the long run. But creativity isn’t something you can learn overnight. Nor is it something you can purchase from the grocery store. Creativity is art. Creativity is developed, and you do so by looking for your inner writer.
​

Having a good potential as a writer doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easier for you in the process. Sure, you might already know the basic technicalities of good writing, but you’re still going to go through the same struggle that every writer is supposed to go through. It’s the only way for you to grow as a writer.

​
Joe Baldwin
​Joe Baldwin is a native US resident & professional Article writer for https://essaylook.com. He studied English literature and creative writing. He has experience with online web content including blogs, web page content, news, public relations, press releases, and long form sales and industrial presentations.
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Chilling Romantic Drama, Remember When, Coming Soon

3/13/2017

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What Matters Most? A New Romantic Drama to Remind You

Picture
A single moment can change everything… but can love help us survive?

This wasn’t how it was supposed to be…

Settled into married life, Jessica and Todd think they have so much time… until everything comes to a halt on a snowy back road. When they find themselves in a life or death situation, with rescue seeming impossible, they cling to the only hope they have left: their love for each other.

As Jessica and Todd fight for survival, their connection carries them through the biggest challenge of their lives. Memories and regrets swirl around the couple as they finally take a moment to reflect on what really matters.

There’s one big, icy question that haunts them, though: Is this where their story will end?

Remember When, releasing April 29, 2017 with Hot Tree Publishing

Add it to your TBR list!
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Hacksaw Ridge Movie Review

3/11/2017

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WWII Hacksaw Ridge
Although I can appreciate a war movie, they are not my first pick. However, I'd heard great things about this movie and decided to give it a try with my husband. Overall, I would give this movie a 5/5 stars because it truly is an inspirational story that made you consider the power of war, the strength of identity, and the concept of heroism. 

Synopsis 

This is the true story of Army Medic Desmond Doss, a man who served in the Battle of Okinawa. Because of his beliefs, Desmond does not believe in killing and instead wants to serve as a medic in the army. After facing hatred from sergeants, fellow fighters, and even going to court for his refusal to hold a gun, Desmond makes his way to the war front in the Pacific. Most of the movie focuses on the taking of Hacksaw Ridge, where Desmond becomes a hero.

My Review

This movie made me realize how important it is to stick to your convictions. The beauty of this movie is in the fact that Desmond never gives up his beliefs, even when it would have been easier to just abandon his ideas. It also underscores that a war hero does not equal a killing machine. What Desmond did is so unbelievable and shows his strength of character.

This movie also shows the horrors of war in a deep way. The exhaustion, injuries, and devastation aren't downplayed. I love that it shows the realities of war and makes you realize just how heroic all of the men who fought really were just for stepping foot on the battlefield. 

There is also an underlying love story as Desmond falls in love with Dorothy before going to war. I wish the movie would have focused more on her perspective because I'm sure there would have been extra anxiety about a man going into battle without a gun. 

As a needle phobe, the only thing I didn't like were the constant needles and medical procedures. Dorothy is a nurse, so there is a long blood test scene at the beginning of the movie that had me squirming.

At the end of the movie, you get to see footage of the actual man who lived the story. It saddens me to think his amazing tale hasn't been told until now on a wide scale. He deserved recognition. I wish he would have had the chance to see the movie.

In short, this isn't your typical WWII movie and is definitely worth the watch, even if you don't typically watch war movies. This movie is about identity, loyalty, and the idea that a hero can come in so many forms.
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Finding Adventure in an Average, Married Life

3/5/2017

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Married Life
In my fuzzy gray sweatpants and a sloppy sweatshirt, I snuggle into my spot on the sectional, remote in hand and a coffee on the end table. A few cats curl up in my lap and our mastiff Henry finds his spot among his favorite collection of toys as I make the big decision—will it be Jane the Virgin, Reign, or Nashville tonight?


​Meanwhile, my husband plops himself onto his computer chair in front of his beloved computer games, waiting for the oven timer to beckon him forth for his chicken patty or frozen pizza. It’s a Saturday night and we’re under 30, but you wouldn’t know it by our schedule. The wild life of the 20-something isn’t quite our scene—we’re content tucked in at home with our favorite things.

Although lazy days at home are essential and envy-worthy, strings of them have led us to somewhat humdrum, introverted lives. Other than some trips to the beach and a few local events, our scrapbook of memories mostly sits empty.

This is a far-cry from our dating years, when we went countless unique places. Our scrapbook is filled with memories from museums, art installations, plays, concerts, zoos, and aquariums. We can flip through the pages and say, “remember when” with smiles and laughs about the experiences. Most of these trips were school sponsored or college sponsored, but the point is the memories we have from those trips are memories we used as a foundation for our connection.

They are the moments we look back on with a smile. They weave our connected history.

Achieving our Bucket List

At 29, we’ve come to realize that it isn’t really the traveling part or where you go—it’s the fact you’re doing something new together. Looking back over the years, the times we got out of our comfy clothes and pushed ourselves out of our comfort zone to try something new are the times we remember with a smile.

Thus, with 30 looming over us, we felt a need to change it up this year. I know age is just a number, but there is something symbolic about the shift from the 20s to the 30s. I want the shift to be memorable. I want this to be a year we can fill our scrapbook. I want it to be a year we talk about for the next decade.

So this year, we’ve vowed to try new things. We’ve made an achievement list inspired by my husband’s love for gaming. We’ve included big goals and trips that probably won’t happen, but we’ve also set small realistic goals. 

We’ve picked local places we’ve never been. We agreed to do some sort of volunteer work together this year. We’ve vowed to go inner tubing and horseback riding. I agreed to finally get my tattoo this year. We’ve talked about memories that will fill our scrapbook and give us a sense of adventure.
​

Adventure on a Budget

Adventure on a Budget
​Because, like so many, we’re on a budget, our list isn’t extravagant. We don’t own a yacht, and an impromptu trip to Tahiti, although adventurous, isn’t in the cards for us right now. We are small town, simple people who have never been out of the country together and probably never will be. I’ve come to learn, though, that adventure doesn’t have to equate to an expensive, budget-blowing venture.

Some of our favorite adventures were super cheap and super close by. I don’t think you have to be a world traveler to find adventure. Adventure takes on its own form for everyone. We’re challenging ourselves this year to find our own.

In short, we want to fill our year with new memories because at the end of it, isn’t that what life is all about? At 29, I think we’ve finally realized that the amount of shoes in your closet, the amount of video games on your shelf, and the amount of hours you’ve logged watching Netflix don’t create a life. It’s the true connection of exploring this huge world together that will be something we can look back on.

Are we doing a great job at adhering to our newfound sense of adventure? Not particularly. This past weekend, we checked one of the more luxurious items off our list—we went for our first couple’s massage and added a new memory to our scrapbook. Still, on an average week, it’s hard to break your homebody habits, and Netflix is a beckoning siren’s song. 

Adult responsibilities, stresses, and exhaustion all tempt us to leave the scrapbook blank for one more year. There’s nothing wrong with a few lazy days, and we know our list probably won’t get completely finished. Nonetheless, we’re getting out and making as many memories as we can. We’re saying “yes” to more invitations even when we’re tempted to say “no.” We’re finding that life isn’t necessarily built sitting on a couch eating snacks. Life is about finding, exploring, trying, experiencing, and finding. Life is about building moments together so that someday, when we look back on this life we’ve had together, we can say, “Do you remember when…”

I think we’ve figured out that making memories with those you love the most is how you truly find an adventurous, fulfilling life full of joy.

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