It's the time of year when everyone's talking about being thankful. When it comes to my parents, there's so much I'm thankful for.

Most of all, though, I'm thankful for the time you told me "no."

Okay, in fairness, that's super vague because there were probably a million times I heard "no" in my childhood. But this specific no is one that sticks out vividly in my mind, even decades later. Perhaps it's because at the time, it was one of the most "traumatic" moments of my five-year-old life.

You were babysitting a girl who was the daughter of your friends and, thus, was one of my friends. She was a few years younger than me. My memory doesn't tell me what we were doing out and about. It starts with me standing beside the two of you as you pushed my younger friend in a cart in a toy aisle. I stood beside you as you talked. That's when my friend and I both saw it. My five-year-old eyes sparkled with delight at the beautiful endcap display.

There were tiny babies in bathtubs.

I'm sure if I saw it now, it would be laughable. But to my friend and me, they were amazing. Truly amazing. A mini, pocket-sized babydoll that came with her own bathtub. A clawfoot bathtub! You could put water in that bathtub! You could put the whole thing in your pocket or purse or wherever you wanted! It could probably fit in the Polly Pockets I had.

We needed it.

Grabbing hands reached for the endcap. Noticing our desire, the two of you chatted about something, but I was focused on the toy that just had to be mine.

And then Mom, you reached for them. My heart swelled with joy. I was thinking of names for the baby in the bathtub that would soon be mine.

You handed one baby in a bathtub to my friend, who squealed with delight from the cart. I reached for mine, waiting for you to hand it to me.

You shook your head, and my heart sank. This couldn't be happening. I asked for one. You looked at me, sighed, and said, "No." You promised I would get something else, though. You pushed the cart into the next aisle, and I felt tears welling.

I remembered what you said, though, about never being bratty. I didn't throw the tantrum I wanted to, but I stared with envy as my friend giggled and stared at the baby in the bathtub. Her baby in a bathtub.

In the next aisle, Dad reached for a book. I recognized the cover. It was my Learning To Read book with the silly dog cartoon on the cover. I'd mastered the most recent color of the book at the picnic table with you, so we needed the next book. You handed it to me, telling me I was getting that instead.

I stared at the book filled with work pages. I looked at my friend with the baby in the bathtub.

I felt cheated. I felt devastated. I was pouty, angry, and disappointed. We moved to the checkout, but the whole time, I kept thinking about how unfair it was.

I was so sad about the baby in the bathtub that I can still picture it to this day.

But you know what? I'm so glad you said no. I'm so glad I didn't add that cheap toy to my collection of useless toys that would later be thrown away.

What you gave me that day was so much more important. Looking back now as a twenty-nine-year-old English teacher, writer, and adult, I know without a doubt that choice you made probably wasn't easy. I know you would've bought me both things that day if you could have. But money was tight, and sacrifices sometimes had to be made.

And you decided to break my heart about the baby in the bathtub to get me something that would keep on giving for years to come... the gift of learning. The gift of education.
Over the years, I'd forget about the baby in the bathtub for a while. But I didn't forget the lessons I learned in that workbook. I didn't forget my letters or the words they formed. I didn't lose the passion for reading you helped me uncover that day.

I'm not a parent yet, but from what I've heard, it isn't easy. It's filled with choices and sacrifices. There are disappointments for both parents and children. You sometimes wonder if you are doing the right thing.

That day will forever be in my memory because it was a day I felt like life was so unfair....but that day, when you said no, you also said yes to a pathway that would lead me to where I am today.

Thank you for saying no to the baby in the bathtub... and yes to a love for words, reading, and writing that would last a lifetime.
​
Love you both.

Love isn't just about sex.

It's the one thing I learned from my favorite writer, Nicholas Sparks.
​
From the time I first opened one of his books in junior high, I realized how beautiful, magical, tragic, and complex love truly was. Watching two very diverse people with different struggles, backgrounds, and beliefs find their way to each other was magnetizing. I loved to see how they would meet, how they would overcome their hesitancy, and, most of all, how they would grow and change each other.

The power of the love story wasn't in the physical connection--although the first kiss scenes were always some of my favorites. The true power was in their emotional connection, their ability to overcome odds, and the ability to show that love could triumph even where it was thought to be forever lost.

Perhaps, without even knowing it, my love of Nicholas Sparks' books was preparing me for my own writing journey later on.

When I wrote Voice of Innocence, my first novel, I didn't plan on writing sweet romance--it just came naturally. It was where I thought the depth of the story was. It was where the emotional side of life was resting that I wanted to uncover. It wasn't necessarily an intentional choice to write on the sweeter side of the genre--it was simply what flowed from my pen sitting on my parents' deck that summer when I was twenty-one.

And each story follows the same path. I don't set out with the rigid rule for myself to keep my books clean. I don't set out to keep the focus on the emotional rather than the physical.

It's just what the characters and the stories decide.

In many ways, I think Nicholas Sparks is to blame. He showed me that the true depth of emotion was resting in the connection, in the sweet looks, in the inspiring gestures. Perhaps this is why when I write romance, I focus on the emotional connection, on the love that's experienced in everyday life, and on the love experienced outside of the bedroom walls.

My characters in my eight novels aren't celibate. They love and share and bond. They get into heated situations, and their sexual tension is certainly palpable in many scenes. They give in to lust and primal feelings. They are, after all, human. They are in love. Sex is a part of love.

It's just not the only part.

So although my characters experience their share of intimacy, my books focus on the other areas of intimacy--emotional connection, trust, friendship, laughter, empathy, and strength. They focus on the hardest times in life--loss of loved ones, disappointments, failures, and betrayal--and how love can help us overcome these times. They focus on all of the gritty, raw emotions that are part of the human experience.

My characters are real in their journeys, their words, and their choices. They get angry. They swear. They change their minds and get confused. They fail and make bad decisions. They doubt themselves and each other.

They are also real in their relationships. They aren't perfect, just like in real life. This has always been my goal with my writing.

And, most importantly, just like in real life, their relationships aren't just about sex. Their love stories are complex, weighty journeys filled with all sorts of emotions and connections. Just like in real life, their love stories are not defined by sexuality or physicality. They are defined by multifaceted aspects that contribute to who they are and what they change into.

Love, in the real world, isn't just about sex. Thus, I have always felt like it was my duty to show that romance can be real.... and can be about more than just one thing.

Romance that's real. Romance that's sweet.

That's my mission with my writing.
​
Feel free to join me on my mission to show that the romance genre can reflect real life... and be beautiful because of it.

A bookworm at heart and a lover of the romance genre since junior high, I always dreamed of being an author. For me, though, being an author was a wild, crazy dream, one of those things you daydream about but never think will happen to you.

In my last year of college, I took a class called “The Literature of Health & Healing.” It changed everything. Suddenly, we were talking about bucket lists and dreams. I realized I had no reason to wait to chase my wildest dream--writing a novel. I went home, sat on my parents’ deck, and started writing what would become my first novel, a sweet contemporary romance set in a town very similar to my own.

Voice of Innocence is about a couple who are high school sweethearts when Corbin is wrongfully convicted of a crime. Told from their perspective decades later, it’s a tale filled with regrets, sorrow, and the idea that first love truly never fades away.

My husband, the man who also taught me what love looks like, is the one who encouraged me to send my first book to publishers. After a long journey, I found a publisher and got to see my wildest dream come true.

Now, my eighth novel just released with my amazing publisher I am proud to call home, Hot Tree Publishing. It’s been a wild and crazy journey, just as wild and crazy as my dream. I am so blessed that a small-town girl like me gets to live out my biggest dreams.
What are my books like? Sweet, genuine, and realistic. That’s how reviewers describe me. I’m in the romance genre, but my books aren’t only about love triangles and finding “the one.” They’re sometimes gritty and raw. They’re about impossible situations, frightening tragedies, and also some hilarious settings. I write both chick lit and romantic drama, so out of my eight novels, there’s a balance of humor and tears.

If you’re looking for hot sex on the page, these aren’t for you. My books focus on the emotional side of love--with a touch of spice thrown in. After all, everyone can appreciate some hot foreplay, smoldering kisses, and nice abs now and again, right? Still, my focus is on the buildup and the emotional side of romance. These tend to be books you can share with all of the women in your life--your mom, your grandma, your best friend--and not blush too much.

My books focus on realism. I want women to see themselves in my characters. I want their complexities, their confusions, and their struggles to feel so real that you forget you’re reading a book. I want you to see yourself, your best friend, your coworker in the strong, emotional characters of my books. I want you to see your own version of romance in the pages.

My characters aren’t perfect because I’m not perfect. None of us are. They change their minds, make mistakes, get lost, doubt themselves, and find joy in the simple things. They are raw and honest. They are complex.

Real romance. Genuine romance. Heartfelt romance. That’s what I’m focusing on.

If you’d like to join me in proving that the romance genre can be realistic, genuine, and powerfully emotional, join my VIP Fan Club where you can get all sorts of freebies, exclusives, and fun surprises: http://bit.ly/2u42BjU
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Find out more about my work on my blog: http://www.lindsaydetwiler.com/
Check out all of my novels on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Lindsay-Detw...

Books are my first love...but makeup and beauty products are a close second.

Check out this amazing review guide by Reviews.com. It will save you time and your hard-earned cash when you're in the market for a new curling iron.

Feel free to share with any of your beauty loving friends.

All of You by Lindsay Detwiler releases January 27th. Treat yourself now while it's #99cents.
There’s no such thing as impossible when it comes to saving the one who holds your heart.
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/2yn3rXG 
Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/2hnb2Ce 
Amazon CA: http://amzn.to/2hWPj10 
Amazon AU: http://amzn.to/2yLVsrp 
Kobo: http://bit.ly/2ApHasT 
Apple: http://apple.co/2hhDMbJ
TBR: www.goodreads.com/book/show/35527988-all-of-you
A sexy doctor who’s restricted by expectations.
A quirky poet who’s defined by her dark past.
All it takes is Alex Evans saving Marley Jade one fateful night for their futures to be realigned. And when a passion sparks between them, they must decide if they can piece each other back together and make love work.
#AllOfYou_Reveal #LindsayDetwiler #HTPubs

Love Notes by Lindsay Detwiler
Do you like getting mail...that isn't junk mail or a bill? I'm going old school and sending out some fun surprises related to my new release, Inked Hearts. Get your exclusive free gift in the mail by filling out this simple form!
Feel free to share with your friends!

Love Notes by Lindsay Detwiler
Do you like getting mail...that isn't junk mail or a bill? I'm going old school and sending out some fun surprises related to my new release, Inked Hearts. Get your exclusive free gift in the mail by filling out this simple form!
Feel free to share with your friends!