Celebrating the love of a dogIt wasn’t always easy to love you. When you first came home (against my wishes), you were a floppy mess of puppy breath, clumsiness, and poor manners. You jumped and chewed. You ruined my favorite shoes. You had accidents and popped a Coke can with your teeth, spraying sticky soda on the ceiling. It wasn’t always easy to love you. When I was trying to do work and you chewed on my pant leg, or when you peed on my lap in my favorite sweats. When it took hours and hours and hours to teach you how to listen, how to come, how to behave. It wasn’t always easy to love you. But through it all, you settled into my heart, and we settled into a routine of summers on the deck and ice cream and running through the sprinkler. Of nights on the couch cuddled up with Netflix, of too many cupcakes, of car rides, of walks through the neighbourhood. Of Pumpkinfest in our local town, of visiting family, of just being together. It was easy to love you with those soulful brown eyes and that playful spirit. Now, you’re getting more gray by the hour. Your hips don’t work like they used to, and age is creeping up on our time together. It isn’t always easy to love you again. When you get me up several times a night because you just can’t hold it anymore, and you still have more accidents than ever. When your bones don’t work like they should and you struggle to get up, to walk up stairs, to do basic things. It isn’t always easy to love you. When I look at you now and I see the playful spirit but an aging body that won’t let you have the fun you want. When I watch you struggle to stand, to walk, it isn’t easy. When I still sense your loving spirit but we can’t have the adventures we used to. When all days, now, our time is pretty much limited to the couch with Netflix. It isn’t always easy to love you. When I know that sooner rather than later, you’re going to shred my heart to pieces and gut me when you take your final breath. When I know we’re closer to goodbye than to hello now. When I know that eventually, I’m going to have to face this world without you. It isn’t easy to love you. But love you, I do. Because through the puppy days and the angry days and the chewing days and the older days—through everything in between, you have shown me how to love not just you, but life itself. You’ve shown me what unconditional friendship and love looks like. You’ve changed me, helped me to grow into who I am. You’ve been beside me on my ugly days, on my tough days, on days with messy tears. It isn’t easy to love anyone or anything in this world because we always know it’s temporary. But love you I have. Love you I do. Love you I will, even when you aren’t here. To the love we have for our dogs….the love that isn’t always easy, but is always there. Lindsay Detwiler
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